UNSUBSCRIBE!

A sign of how good a company is in this digital age, is how easy it is to unsubscribe from their marketing emails. 

I recently had a spring clean of my personal mailbox, Having waded through 48,432 emails (obviously I just scan read some them) I decided to unsubscribe from most of the salesy ones that I didn’t need.

There seems to be 3 levels of unsubscribe-ability.

1. The premier league. You scroll to the bottom of the email, it says ‘Unsubscribe’, you hit the button and you get a message that says “You have unsubscribed’’ and possibly - a thank you.

2. Semi-pro. You scroll to the bottom of the email, you eventually find ‘Unsubscribe’, you hit the button and a window pops up and gently cross examines you to establish your motivation for leaving - then, when it finally accepts that it’s over - you get a sad message with a sorrowful looking emoji face saying please come back when you’ve had some time and space!

3. Sunday morning pub league.

You scroll to the bottom of the email, to find ‘Unsubscribe’, and it’s nowhere to be seen. 

Then you finally find a line of page grey type hidden the email (that you have no interest in reading) that says “to unsubscribe from these emails, please email: ’unsubscribe@i_dont_remember_signing_up_for_this_in_first_place.com/unsubscribe” and it’s not even a link, so you have to copy and paste it into your email programme.  

Then you get an email back - that goes into your spam, that you miss. When you do finally find it in your next spring clean, it says, YOU UNSUBSCRIBED FROM OUR EMAILS! WHO THE… HECK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE! If you think you can get rid of us THAT EASY, you’ve got another think coming bucko!

OK, maybe version 3 isn’t quite that bad, but if you are running email marketing campaigns, try to make your emails the easiest in the world ever to unsubscribe to, and make the world a better place!

UNSUBSCRIBE!

5 blogs...

...in 10 years, can hardly be described as prolific, in anyone's language, but the main reason for my infrequent postings is that I become suicidal everytime I attempt to log in to my effing Blog!

Christ knows what has happened this time! Since last I logged in, or on, or whatever it is, the whole site seems to have been taken over by Google. Now I don't actually know if I'm blogging or not, if I'm logged on (or in) or not, or if I'm accidentally buying something off of Ebay!

Help me someone - please!

Logging off...

or out...

or something!....

Monday Morning!

Friends Reunited is great isn't it. If you search there you can find me.
Of course, like most people, I've reinvented myself for Friends Reunited and totally made up a glorious life for myself since I left school back in the 80s!
I've left out all the stuff about the petty crime and the spells inside!
I neglected to mention the botched facelift and even more botched genital enhancement.
I didn't talk about the abortion, the miscarriages and the suicidal moments!
Because everyone thinks I'm fine - and I'm funny.
Oh - I'm the funniest person you've ever met! Didn't you know

That's what I call progress!

Well - it's been 20 months since my last post and I've got to say there's been a lot of changes in my life since the last post in October 2005!
Erm, I grew a beard. Then I shaved it off.
I got into more debt!
I received approximately 3,630 offers of Viagra and/or Cialis or whatever its called!

Maybe Blogging isn't the vehicle for my writing that I thought it would be! It seems very lonely - to throw your thoughts out there only for them to be ignored.

Still, I'll try again in another couple of years!!

Post Number 2

So here's the first of my pictures!

Great isn't it!

If you want to know what inspired this masterpiece - tune in tomorrow!

Entry Level Blog!

This is my first entry in my blog!

I haven't got a clue where this will go - but we're underway!